Denizens of the Republic of Plumsville are cordially invited to attend the swearing-in ceremony of the new cabinet of its Federal Government.
Hon’ble President, Lord Emsworth (Clarence Threepwood, 9th Earl of Emsworth), would preside over the function. The Vice President, Mr. Chichester Clam, shall also grace the occasion.
The ceremony shall begin with the Hon’ble President raising the National Flag, to the accompaniment of a rendering of the National Anthem ‘Sonny Boy’ by Ms. Cora Bellinger.
The Hon’ble President, the Vice President and the incumbent Prime Minister shall thereafter garland the statue of Sir Pelham Grenville Wodehouse, KBE, the Father of the Nation.
Oaths shall be administered by the Chief Justice of Plumsville, Sir Watkyn Bassett. Oaths shall be in the name of the Constitution of Plumsville, viz., The Code of the Woosters.
Here are the respective portfolios and the incumbents:
Prime Minister: Mr. Rupert Psmith (‘p’ is silent)
Commerce and Industry: Ms. Joan Valentine
Defence: Ms. Stephanie Byng
Entrepreneurship: Ms. Sally
Fashion Design: Sir Roderick Spode
Finance: Mr. Stanley Featherstonehaugh Ukridge
Food Processing: Mr. Anatole
Health & Family Welfare: Mr. Ashe Marson
Home: Ms. Dahlia Travers
Human Resource/Education: Ms. Tomlinson
International Relations: Mr. Reginald Jeeves
Information & Broadcasting: Mr. Mulliner
Labour & Employment: Mr. Gussie Fink-Nottle
Literature and Fine Arts: Ms. Rosie M. Banks
Matrimonial Bliss: Mr. Bingo Little
Milk of Human Kindness: Mr. Bertram Wilberforce Wooster
Net Neutrality: Sir Gregory Parsloe-Parsloe
Parliamentary Affairs: Hon. Galahad Threepwood
Space and Atomic Energy: Ms. Madeline Bassett
Sports: Ms. Pauline Stoker
Taxation: Mr. Tom Travers
Terror Management: Ms. Roberta Wickham
Tissue Restoratives: Ms. Postlethwaite
Tourism: Ms. Angela Travers
Transport: Mr. Percy Craye, Earl of Worplesdon
Wildlife & Forests: Captain Cuthbert Gervase ‘Bwana’ Brabazon-Biggar
The swearing-in ceremony shall be followed by a short program, as follows:
Speech by Mr. Rupert Psmith
‘Meeting Millennium Development Goals: The Role of Humour in enhancing the Gross Happiness Index of countries’
Brief talk by Ms. Stephanie Byng
‘Defending borders of countries with a dash of humour; The need to set up training academies in pinching helmets’
Presentation by Mr. Gussie Fink-Nottle
‘Boosting employment prospects of youth by encouraging newt-rearing industry’
Brief talk by Mr. Bertram W. Wooster
‘Managing Immigrants in an increasingly globalized world – An Innovative Approach based on the Milk of Human Kindness’
Talk by Sir Gregory Parsloe-Parsloe
‘Maintaining Net Neutrality by pinching servers and technocrats from neighbouring countries’
Address by Ms. Roberta Wickham
‘Using the hot-water-bottle puncturing strategy and other goofy schemes to neutralize terroristic endeavours’
Video presentation by Ms. Angela Travers
‘Promoting tourism by protecting sharks and whales’
A vaudeville performance by Aunt Julia and Joe Danby
A parody of the Market Snodsbury speech of Mr. Gussie Fink-Nottle, delivered by Master Seabury
The President shall thereafter be pleased to have you with him and the newly inducted team at the lavish luncheon being planned by Monsieur Anatole, God’s gift to our gastric juices. He shall be assisted by the house staff, led by Mr. Sebastian Beach.
The event shall conclude with a Guard of Honour, led by Colonel Aubrey Wyvern, astride the high-bred Potato Chip.
Venue: Forecourt of Blandings Castle
Date: October 15, 2015
Time: 10:00 hours sharp
Notes:
1. Guests and invitees are hereby requested to take their seats by 09:45 hours.
2. Pets are strictly discouraged, lest they disturb the pre-lunch siesta of the Empress of Blandings. James Pirbright shall be in attendance. All the decent sheep and cattle shall be hustled away into regions unknown, so the ceremony may proceed without any interruption.
3. Cell phones and technical gizmos of all kinds shall need to be deposited with Constable Ernest Dobbs at the entrance.
4. For those who wish to take a guided tour of the magnificent gardens and the moss-covered yew alley, Mr. Angus McAllister shall be available after the conclusion of the ceremony.
RSVP: Secretary to the Hon’ble President: Rupert Baxter.
(Notes:
- Inputs received from avid fans of P G Wodehouse are gratefully acknowledged.
- You may also like to check out: https://ashokbhatia.wordpress.com/2015/10/10/politicos-in-plumsville-part-1)
Related Post:
ashokbhatia 